Horrid day yesterday......felt crap all day and throat just got worse and worse & felt like I'd had a good kicking..and the Poacher didn't ring all day....and it was getting very late.and I started to imagine he and JC had been in an accident..as JC was driving and had stood on his bins a couple of days ago ....but they turned up around seven, filthy and covered in paint...he'd forgotten his phone....
I milked the self pity for 5 minutes but the bugger made me laugh, then made tea.....bless his darlin heart...
He said he'd look after me whatever happened....which was all I needed to hear.
So resting up today..managed to get a Doctor's appointment first thing & antibiotics script should I need them...(although I hate them and will only take them if I haven't managed to beat the buggering infection off with just the power of my antibodies by the weekend, as I have work and a photographic assignment with the huntin shootin fishin set.....at a weekend big horse event....)
It has been a shock to the system the Poacher working all week...I feel a bit lost...and not a little insecure about the young jodhpur wearing pony club set that hang around the yard. I never used to be the jealous type but since the actor my confidence got such a hammering I can't trust anyone anymore....I hope this is just a temporary state of affairs, as I know what happens when you hold on too tight......
I need to get working and involved again with other friends.....I just enjoy each moment with him so much.....I can not bear to think of being here without him in my life, but still having to see him....I suppose if the worst happens that's when I revert to the original plan and head for Brazil...